Nothing Sweet
by InnerEssence
Summary: After one of 'those' missions Sam needs a bit of release. I should add a warning this isn't a pretty fic.


There was a time when touching herself while thinking of her CO used to leave her feeling ashamed and guilty for hours after. The first time she would see him, after coming with his name echoing in her mind, she would avoid his eyes. Sure, that he knew last night she was picturing him thrusting into her body hard enough to make her scream.

There was a time when she barely acknowledged to herself that the moments before she came and came hard it was Jack who was on her mind. She pretended that her fantasies didn't involve her and her CO in the most compromising positions she could think of.

But that was a long time ago now. These days she was tired of hiding from herself so she stopped. Now it barely touched her that while her own fingers moved inside her hard and rough, in her mind it was Jack who was crushed up against her back while his hand worked her to an orgasm.

She didn't kid herself anymore that she wasn't trying to imagine every little detail. The way his skin would feel against hers, slick with their sweat, his heat, the feel of his hard body moulded to her own, those hands that were never still wandering her body. The words and obscenities he would whisper in her ear…

In her mind he wasn't always gentle, or sweet. Sometimes, after one of those dark missions full of blood and violence; after a mission where she got a glimpse of his dark side her thoughts were anything but sweet.

She'd stopped pretending that Jack O'Neill's darkness wasn't another thing that made him so…so alluring and intriguing.

So tonight as she lay in her bed naked, muscles still tense from one of those missions, she didn't even try to stop her mind from drifting towards Jack. She knew exactly what she wanted…the need for some sort of release was a heavy weight at the core of her body.

As her hand moved to the apex of her thigh she closed her eyes and let herself imagine him to her.

She'd watched him spill so much blood today. Crimson blood that flowed over and into the earth staining everything in its path. He hadn't even flinched… then again nor had she. But she'd seen him come alive on the battlefield. The steely determination flashing in his eyes, the ruthlessness and of course the darkness lurking there to, held just in check.

If she cared to remember him like that it terrified her and excited her. The power flowing through him almost tangible, it made her want to touch even knowing it meant destruction.

There would be nothing sweet tonight.

In her mind he came to her with the same madness and intensity. His heavy weight pinning her to the bed, his tight grip holding her hands above her head, leaving her vulnerable to his touch.

Then that hot mouth of his all over her, on her breasts, her shoulders, her neck. Everywhere at once, nipping and sucking and biting at her flesh; leaving impressions of his teeth on her tender skin.

All the time his hands gripping her, keeping her still for him, hard enough to bruise. Yes, she wanted to bruise, she wanted evidence of him all over her body.

Him kneading her breasts, manipulating her nipples into hard peeks that ached, only to be soothed by his lips, before the harsh pain of his teeth biting into her. The pain shooting from her nipples and morphing into pleasure.

All the while focusing on her thoughts her own hands were gripping her breasts, working them with a ferocity that almost matched Jack's in her mind.

In her mind he was in control. She found her hands tied to the bed posts, her legs spread wide by one of his hands while the other found her heated centre and pushed inside, rough and fast. She wanted to scream.

Before she could process these feelings her mind had conjured a knife. He held it to her body. The sharp metal cool against her heated flesh.

She gasped, eyes opening wide, her mind shying away from the thought as soon as it had formed. Fighting for air, she tried to work out where that had come from. She could not deny the jolt of arousal that had coursed through her body at the thought of having him holding a knife.

Closing her eyes she let her thoughts take her back…

Her body lay stiff under the knife, every muscle tense, waiting for his next move. She watched him trail the metal over her skin, up her inner thighs. He used it carress her folds, then before she knew what was happening he slashed it across her inner thigh, just lightly, enough to break the skin.

She screamed from the flash of pain.

Then watched fascinated as his tongue followed the broken skin, tasting the tiny drop of blood leaking out.

She was trembling now, her whole body wracked by tiny tremors, but still her juices flowed and her arousal reached knew levels.

No more, she couldn't take anymore. Her fingers moved harder and faster on her clit, trying to find her release. Her flesh felt sore from all the friction but it wasn't enough. She needed more. She needed to come… damn it.

Moving onto her front she pulled the duvet between her thighs in frustration, rubbing herself against it till she was dry, then kept going. The material rubbed against her now dry folds, almost burning but she couldn't stop. Frustration and desperation kept her moving harder and faster.

The tension inside was coiled so tight and every second it built stronger and stronger till finally, after a moment of stillness when her every muscle in her body stiffened, her orgasm rumbled through her like an earthquake.

She screamed from the force of her release, and the feel of her vaginal walls contracting against nothing.

And then it was over. She lay on her back suddenly aware of the sweat trickling down her body and the chill now taking hold of her. Pulling the discarded duvet over her body she cuddled under it, wishing not for the first time, it was jack's warm body protecting her from the cold…

The ringing of the phone brought her back from the brink of sleep. Reaching for the receiver she pulled herself upright to sit against the headboard.

"Carter"

"Yeh, hey." It was Jack.

"Sir… is there a problem," she glanced at her bedside clock. 2am

"No, no" he assured her hurriedly. "Sorry I know its kinda late…"

"It's ok Sir. What can I do for you?"

"Well Hammond wants that mission report from me by tomorrow, well today actually, but I haven't done it yet…"

Yeh, it was a long time ago now, when she use to feel guilty for her thoughts. She'd learned to be honest with herself, to stop hiding. Maybe, just maybe one day she could stop hiding from him too.

She sighed.

"Well sir, if you wanna take a look at mine it's in my out tray"

….


End file.
